sábado, 22 de dezembro de 2007

REDEFINIÇÃO DO SIGNIFICADO DAS PROFISSÕES

ADVOGADO: É uma pessoa que escreve um documento de 10.000 palavras e o chama "sumário"

ARQUITETO: Diz-se de um cara que não foi suficientemente "macho" para ser engenheiro, nem suficientemente "bicha" para ser decorador.

AUDITOR: É o que chega depois da batalha e pisa nos feridos.

BANQUEIRO: É um cara que te empresta um guarda-chuva quando faz um sol radiante e o pega de volta no instante que começa a chover (Mark Twain)

POLÍTICO: Pessoa que obtém dinheiro dos ricos e votos dos pobres para proteger um do outro.

CONSULTOR: É alguém que tira o relógio do teu pulso, te diz a hora e te cobra por isso.

DIPLOMATA: É quem lhe diz "vá à merda" de um modo tal que você fica ansioso para começar a viagem.

ECONOMISTA: É um expert que saberá amanhã por que o que predisse ontem não aconteceu hoje.

FÍSICO QUÂNTICO: É um homem cego em um quarto escuro, procurando por um gato preto que não está lá.

CONTADOR: É o que sabe o custo de tudo e o valor de nada.

FUTEBOL: É com quem toda mulher se casa sem saber.

PROGRAMADOR: É o que te resolve um problema que você não sabia que tinha de uma maneira que você não compreende.

PSICÓLOGO: É aquele que olha todos os demais quando uma mulher atraente entra na sala.

SUPERMODELOS: Evidência que todos nós fomos mal feitos.

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